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You leave me out in sub-zero temperatures. You never maintain my looks. You always get the cheapest grade of gas. Don't I deserve premium once in awhile? You start my engine, you don't tell me where you're going, but you just go. Sometimes it's a 2 minute drive, other times it's 6 hours. Dirty, muddy feet all over my interior floor, you blast my speakers. How much longer do you expect me to take this treatment? You know what? I've had enough. You can turn the key as much as you want, I refuse to start. I'm not moving from this spot. You can walk to wherever you need to go. Or why don't you go just trade me in for that faster, nicer car you keep talking about? Yeah, that's right, I heard you talking about her. You think I'm deaf? I have feelings too! If you love her so much, WHY DON'T YOU GO MARRY HER?! IS SHE FAST ENOUGH FOR YOU? WILL YOU BE HAPPY WITH HER? WILL YOU GIVE HER PREMIUM?! GO AHEAD, TRADE ME IN! DO IT, YOU HEARTLESS SONNUVA- It's a good thing cars are inanimate objects. |